Quiz - 13 Flavors

If you lie to yourself, you're a liar.

13 Flavors of Fucked Up Quiz

Which one are you? Take the quiz and find out.

You see a puppy. Do you:

kick it
cry
giggle
make puppy noises

Right now, I feel:

stupid
like slitting my wrists and sinking in a warm tub
something evil growing inside
like punching the Jonas Brothers. All of them. Really hard.
like biting my nails again

Today, I would like:

a Cincinnati Bow Tie
to be slipped a ruffie and taken advantage of
a loved one to leave me and never look back
to make a child cry
all of the above

I feel passionate about:

nothing
destroying beautiful things
abusing drugs
being distant from people who love me
protecting our country from the tyranny of terror
using loopholes in religion to get away with practically anything

A perfect world consists of:

people begging for mercy
holes being plowed by thrusting members
lots of booze, rails and hookers
no pubic hair
the end of world hunger and clubbing baby seals for a soft, warm pair of gloves

Yesterday, I:

frowned for 3 hours straight, a new record
harrassed the homeless
worked on my mediocre art project for the desert festival
evaded my spouse's attempt at breaking down our wall of silence
masturbated in the mirror

My friends describe me as:

deceptive, cut-throat and not trustworthy
boring and predictable
the life of the party in a kind of annoying way
suicidal and potentially dangerous
someone to take advantage of

I spend my weekends:

being a slave to religion
online, blowing off my family
with my mistress
focusing my chi
popping "e" and shredding the dance floor

I really enjoy:

making people cry
disappointing those who are close to me
being mentally abused
rubbing my nipples with satin gloves
drinking copious amounts of gin

My advice to young people would be:

kill yourself for the planet, there are too many people here!
eat right, work out, and sell your soul on the internet
force your truth down everyone's throat
become a freedom fighter for God
buy more stuff you don't need
smile even when things don't seem that fun or funny
do whatever it takes to get you ahead
turn the other cheek and get beaten again, it's healthy
look to the stars for guidance and truth
burn rubber and hash oil
stick your neck out on the chopping block and hand your critics a butcher knife
beat dead horses

The afterlife will be:

non-existent
full of boring people who have no social skills
crawling with virgins with no libido
nothing like Jesus promised
a raging party with Satan as the star and host